Life Goes On
by Permanent Rose
Summary: It has been six years since Edward left. Bella Swan has gone on with her life, though she is still fragile and broken. She's married and expecting her first child. What will happen when Edward returns after all these years?
1. Regrets

A/N: Hello everyone

A/N: Hello everyone! This is one of my first fan fics.

Anyway, I know this sounds like a lot of Twilight fan fics, but I'd like you to give it a chance.

I don't want to give too much away, but basically Edward never came back because Bella never jumped off the cliff, therefore Alice never had the vision. Six years later, Bella has gone with her life, though she is still broken and fragile. What happens when Edward decides to come back?

Please take the time to review because I won't know if you like it if you don't say so.

Disclaimer: I would tell you if I was Stephenie Meyer.

_Prologue—Regrets _

**Edward's POV:**

She slept peacefully, unaware of my presence. She was sprawled out across her many pillows, her blankets wrapped loosely around her. Her chocolate hair fell around her face, her slightly flushed cheeks, her full, beautiful lips. A goddess, an angel, my love.

I sat on the edge of her bed, as close as I dared. I wanted more than anything to take her in my arms and tell her how much I loved her. But I couldn't. Not after what had happened. Not after what I was going to do.

The others did not agree with my decision. They could not see the danger, the harm, the urgency of the situation. They were so certain it would never happen again; that since it had happened, we would know how to prevent it from happening again.

They were right, in a sense, but they would not allow themselves to see the other side, the side I could clearly see. It pained me, but it could not be ignored. She had been so close to death. The fear I felt in that one moment made me see what I had been ignoring for so long. She was so fragile, so breakable, and even my slightest touch could shatter her. Every moment she spent with me could be her last. I had tried so long to block it out, to tell myself that everything would work out.

But it would not. She deserved so much more, so many things I couldn't give her. She deserved mortality. I would not take away her precious soul. She deserved to be in a full relationship with a man, not one like ours, with so many cautious restrictions. She deserved to get married, have children, live her life without fear and danger, then finally, die. It pained me that I could not give these things to her, when there was another out there who could.

"Edward," my name softly escaped her perfect lips.

Even in the darkness, I could see her cheeks colour slightly. It made me smile that she even managed to blush in her sleep. But the smile seemed so small, so lost in a sea of despair.

If I had been capable of crying, my tears would've flowed openly then. But I could not cry. It hurt that I could not even properly mourn the loss of my love.

I stayed all night, watching my beautiful angel until the sun peeked over the horizon. Before leaving, I deeply inhaled her glorious scent; a scent I vowed never to forget.

I silently took the CD I had given her out of her player, then pulled the pictures of myself out of her scrapbook. Lastly, I took the plane ticket she had received for her birthday. She needed to forget, no matter how much I never wanted her too. I was about to place the items securely in my pocket when I stopped. Instead, I pried open the floor boards and placed them there, in hopes that she would find them someday.

The faint sunlight now streamed through the window, reminding me that the world would soon be awakening. I sighed as I turned to go, but stopped to look at her once more.

_Sleep on, my love, _I thought, _one more night, knowing I still love you. But never let anything make you forget. I love you, Bella, forever and always._


	2. Forbidden Past

A/N: Just so you know, I started writing this before Eclipse came out so my werewolf facts are a bit off. I hope you're enjoying it.

Disclaimer: Still not Stephenie Meyer (though I wish I was)

_Chapter I—Forbidden Past _

**Bella's POV:**

I woke to lively song of twittering birds coming through our open window. The bright sunlight promised a mild spring day, which was rare on the rainy town of Forks. I snuggled deeper into the strong, tanned arms of my husband, not yet wanting to get and face the day.

Jacob murmured softly in his sleep. A few moments later, his eyelids fluttered open. He smiled at me, as he did every morning when we woke. He was the sunshine of my day.

I pressed my lips to his warm, bare shoulder. He cupped my face in his huge hands and leaned into a long, soft kiss. I loved waking up to this.

"How are my girls?" he grinned as he stroked my tangled hair.

I rolled over onto my back so that my rounded abdomen was facing up. "How are you so sure it's a girl?" I was grinning, too.

"I have my ways."

I knew Jacob was desperately praying for a girl so the awful fate that was bestowed upon him, would have no chance of being passed down to his child. With a boy, it was a possibility.

I felt a slight stirring in my stomach. I took Jacob's large hand and pressed it to my belly. "Feel that? She's moving." It was amazing to experience these small miracles everyday.

"That's my girl," Jacob smiled. "She'll be ready to see the world soon."

"Not too soon," I hoped. "She's only been in there for a little over eight months. She'd better get some patience."

He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me as close as the growing baby would let me. I don't know how long we stayed this way, wrapped in each other's arms, wrapped in each other's love.

"We'd better get going soon," Jacob whispered, his warm lips on my ear.

"Oh, yeah," I mumbled. "It's Sunday." Over the past few months, we had gradually formed the tradition of going over Sam's house for breakfast every Sunday. Emily's cooking was simply irresistible.

"I get the shower first!" I launched our daily argument.

"Darn it!" Jacob pretended to be upset. "Why do girls always win?" He was right. I _always_ got the shower first.

"Because that's what girls do!" I got up and started toward the bathroom, but not before giving Jacob a quick kiss.

Since I was feeling particularly nice this morning, I took a quick shower and saved some hot water. I dried off and wrapped my towel around myself before entering the room. Jacob looked up, surprised.

"I can be quick when I want to be," I smiled at Jacob. "And you'd better be too if we want any food to be left."

"Alright," Jacob faked a whine and dragged himself out of bed. "If I must."

Before going into the bathroom, he stopped and kissed my wet shoulder, making me shiver slightly.

"I'll be out soon," he disappeared behind the door.

While he showered, I dressed in a pair of jeans and a light blue top. As I pulled the shirt over my torso, I realized it was a tad bit too short. That baby was growing faster than I could keep up.

Jacob was soon out of the shower, beating my record time by a lot. He quickly dressed, and we made our way over to Sam's.

Our house was located between the reservation of La Push and Charlie's house. Jacob said it was perfect because it was halfway between both of our previous lives. This way Charlie or Billy could not complain about us playing favorites.

As always, when we opened the door to the Uley house, a loud ruckus and the pleasant smell of breakfast cooking greeted us.

"Auntie Bella and Uncle Jake are here!" Thomas, Sam and Emily's three-year-old son, ran toward us.

I scooped the small child up in my arms. "How's my Tommy?"

"Hungry!" the small boy shrieked. Despite his three years, Thomas looked at least four and a half, if not five. It seemed as though he was always hungry and always growing. There was doubt he was taking after his father, werewolf genes and all.

I handed Thomas over to Jacob and greeted the Uley's two other children. Stephanie, at two, sat in her playpen sucking on the arm of a baby doll. I ruffled her blonde curls and she gave me a grin in return. Unlike her brother, Stephanie was extremely small and delicate for her age.

Next was seven-month-old-Marissa, who was beginning to fuss in her swing next to Stephanie's playpen. I gently picked her up and took a bottle out of the fridge. I placed it in the microwave to warm it up.

"You've got a way with children," Emily said from her position at the stove. "You'll be a great mother when yours comes along."

I blushed as I rocked Marissa, pleased by her comment.

Breakfast was soon ready, and we all crowded around the small table. We laughed and talked over the delicious meal. I watched Emily break Stephanie's food into small pieces so they were easier to consume. I saw the love in Emily's motherly smile as she watched her son across the table. Her motherly actions triggered a memory. I found myself thinking of someone else that I had once known; someone from a past life. I swallowed back tears and forced myself to listen closer to the conversation. I was soon caught up in one of Sam's funny anecdotes and my silent outburst was forgotten for the moment. Soon all the food was gone, courtesy of Jacob, Sam, and Thomas.

Emily cleared the table and did the dishes while I wiped Thomas and Stephanie's messy faces and fed Marissa another bottle.

Our husbands had disappeared to the family room to watch baseball. I helped Emily put the girls down for their morning naps and change Thomas into some clean clothes. Then there was nothing left to do. I hated doing nothing. It made my mind wander and I hated that.

"I'm going for a walk by the beach, Em," I called as I made my way out the door.

Emily smiled, but said nothing. She was used to my frequent disappearances.

A walk was a bad idea. Memories began to seep back in as I starred out at the grey sea. Such small things could trigger memories.

_Try not to fall into the ocean or get run over or anything, all right? _A velvety voice rang in my ear. Tears stung my eyes. I hurtled a stone into the still water. I crumpled to the ground, clutching my chest for dear life. Except it wasn't the same as it used to be. My rounded stomach was now in the way, reminding me of Jacob. And Jacob made my life all worth living. I was able to breathe again.

"Are you all right, Bella?" a voice called. I turned to see Emily. She always knew when I needed her. Over the past few years, we'd become close. I'd confided in her, and even though she was a bit biased toward the whole vampire thing, considering Sam, she always listened to me and added advice when she could.

"Now I am," I answered Emily's question and it was true. Jacob made everything better.

"I can't believe it's been over six years," I whispered. "I should be over it by now."

"I know it's hard, sweetie," Emily said. "But there are some things that we can never completely let go of."

We stood in silence for a moment before Emily began back toward the house. I followed, trying to forget my forbidden past.


	3. Emptiness

A/N: Here's the next chapter. The next update won't be until at least this weekend--Thanks to those who reviewed. I really appreciate it.

Disclaimer: Last time I checked, I was not Stephenie Meyer

_Chapter II—Emptiness_

**Edward's POV:**

I was empty; nothingness invaded me. Without her, my life was pointless and not worth living. I could not live through eternity like this. No. There had to be something better.

_Edward, don't do this to yourself._ Alice's thoughts filled my mind as she entered the room.

I sighed heavily as I continued to pace.

"Please, Edward," Alice spoke aloud this time, her voice full of pleading and concern.

"Alice, you don't have to worry about me. I have everything under control," I lied.

"Sure you do," Alice said, a harsh tone in her voice.

I had to agree with her.

"Edward, the past six years have been miserable for us all. Watching you suffer like this makes us all hurt, too. You need to move on," she placed her small hand on my shoulder.

"I've tried, but there is nothing left that matters. I love her," Alice didn't miss the present tense of 'love'.

"Then why did you leave her?" Alice started up the usual argument.

"I've told you, Alice," I was growing impatient, "It was better for her. So she could have the chance at a normal life."

_I just hope it didn't work, _I added in my head.

"But she loved you Edward. You were the life she had chosen for herself."

"Just leave me alone, Alice!" I snarled, knowing that her words were true. I didn't want to hear them.

Before Alice could say anything further, I stormed out of the room. I needed be alone. The thoughts of the others around me filled my mind. Sometimes I just hated my ability. I need to get away from it all.

The cold Alaskan air hit me as I flung open the door. I didn't care; the cold didn't affect me. I ran for awhile until I didn't know where I was anymore. I sat down heavily on the hard ground, sobbing tearlessly.

I wanted her so badly. I missed absolutely everything about her: her soft brown hair, the way her cheeks flushed, her lovely scent, the feel of her lips against mine…

I wanted it back. I remembered the dejected look she had on her face when I had left her. Maybe she had not moved on. Maybe she had felt the same way I had all these years. It pained me to think of my beautiful angel going through the pain I had, undeservingly. But there was something stronger than that. Hope.

The hope filled my emptiness, my longing, and I knew what I needed to do. I would go back. I would go back and see if she still wanted me. The chances were slim. After all, it had been six years. But I didn't care. I could not suffer through all of eternity not knowing what had become of her. All I needed was to see her beautiful face just one last time…

Yes, I would go back. Despite the consequences, I would return. And for the first time in six years, I had a reason to look forward to tomorrow.


	4. Forever, My Love

A/N: Thanks so much for the reviews. Sorry this chapter is so pathetically short. This weekend I will write you a longer chapter.

Disclaimer: I am not Stephenie Meyer, never have been, never will be (unless I legally change my name)

_Chapter III—Forever, My Love _

**Jacob's POV:**

After returning from the Uley's house, Bella went up to our room to take a nap. The baby wore her down a lot so her naps were becoming more frequent.

"Sleep well, Bella, honey," I whispered as I arranged the blankets and pillows around her.

"I shall only sleep well if you give me a kiss," she smiled, and I bent down to press my lips to her full, beautiful ones, happy to abide by her wishes.

I brushed her long bangs away from her face. Her eyelids fluttered, trying to deny the sleep she needed.

I did not deserve this angel. She was far to perfect for me. Her soft hair, her lovely eyes, and those lips…No. I did not deserve her.

Yet she had chosen me, above all others. Well, almost all others. There was only one who outdid me. Anger pulsed through my entire body when I thought of him. He was the one who had broken Bella, and he was the one who could make her completely whole.

But he was gone, never to return. And if he did, he would have to stand up to me. I would not have him hurt my angel again. No. If that bloodsucker ever returned...

I didn't finish my thoughts for fear of morphing on the spot. Bella's breathing had become slow and even. Her large abdomen rose and fell. I smiled, thinking of the small child growing inside of her. It made me tingle inside to think that I would soon be a father.

I silently left the room, but before leaving, I whispered, "I love you, Bella. Forever, my love."

* * *

A/N: I bit of foreboding in this chapter. What _will _Jacob do when Edward returns?

I basically know where I'm going with this story, but I would love to have some of my readers' opinions. So who do _you_ think Bella should choose?


	5. Memories

A/N: Hey everyone! This is chapter is longer than the last one and I'm currently working on chapter 5. It should be up by tomorrow.

Thanks for all your opinions. You'll just have to wait and see where it goes :)

And thanks for the reviews. All your lovely comments inspire me to keep writing.

Enjoy!

_Chapter IV—Memories_

**Bella's POV:**

"Hey, Charlie!" I called as opened the door to my father's house.

"I'm in the kitchen, Bells," Charlie responded.

He wiped his hands on a towel as I went into the kitchen. I saw that he was preparing a box of instant mac and cheese for lunch, about the most he did these days.

Charlie approached me and wrapped me in a big hug. Ever since my marriage to Jacob, our relationship seemed to have grown closer.

"How's my girl?" he asked, stepping away.

"Fine and dandy," I replied.

"And my grandbaby?" he added.

I wrapped my arms around my belly, "She's doing great."

"I'm getting a granddaughter, eh?" he smiled.

"According to Jake, yes," I returned the smile.

We were silent for a moment. These awkward silences seemed to be unavoidable.

"You eat yet?" Charlie broke the silence.

"Nope," I replied.

"Why don't you stay for lunch then?" he began to scoop some mac and cheese onto two plates.

"Sounds good to me."

He brought the two plates to the small table along with two glasses of milk. I sat down in my usual seat. Nothing much had changed over the years.

"So what brings you here, Bells?" Charlie asked.

"Jake's working at the shop today and I was lonely…Wait. Since when do I need an excuse to visit my father?" I grinned.

"I thought father's were only for when you need to borrow money," he joked, but I could tell he was pleased.

"Well, that is a plus," I said, "But I just thought I'd be nice to pay you a visit. With the baby coming soon, both Jake and I are going to be pretty busy so I won't have as much free time."

"I still can't believe my little girl is going to have a baby," Charlie marveled.

"Dad," I warned. I hated when he got all mushy and sentimental like this.

"Don't 'dad' me," Charlie said, and leaned over and wrapped his arm around my shoulder.

"I remember when Renee was pregnant with you," Charlie got a far away look in his eyes, as if he was traveling deep within himself to relive the memory.

I sat up straighter, more alert. It wasn't often Charlie would talk about my mom, so when he did, I savored the moment.

"She looked so much like you do," he continued, "I had never been so excited in my life. The thought of being a father thrilled me. I don't think Renee was so excited at first, though. We were still so young. We had been married for only a few months when Renee found out she was pregnant. I don't think she was ready for a baby yet. But I was. From the moment she told me we were having a baby, I knew I was ready for you. It was if I had waited my whole life for that moment…" Charlie trailed off.

I didn't want him to be finished yet. I wanted to hear more. It wasn't often I got to see this side of Charlie, but it didn't seem as though he were going to continue.

"So what happened?" I prodded.

"You know the story," Charlie said, "About nine months later, I drove a very pregnant, very irritable Renee to the hospital and you were born. You were the most amazing thing I had ever seen. You were mine. It was so neat to know that the tiny person I looked at before me was part of me. You came home two days later and you ou kept us up all night. You wouldn't believe how loud you could cry, considering your small size. We didn't know heads or tails about taking care of a baby, but we managed. But it all ended too soon. When Renee took you, and left…" he stopped.

He didn't need to say anymore. I looked down at my feet to avoid his gaze. I often wondered what it would've been like if my parents had stayed together. Would we have lived in Forks all our lives? Would we have gone somewhere else? Would we have been happy?

They were all things that had never happened and never would. And Charlie deeply regretted that. He was still partially living in a world fantasies that would never happen. He was still living in a world of memories.

* * *

A/N: I promise its going to get more interesting. Edward comes back next chapter. Until then...


	6. Lost Love

A/N: I finished chapter 5 sooner than I expected to.

To those of you are disappointed with the short chapters, you should be pleased with this one.

Please continue to review. It really inspires me when I see how much you're enjoying it.

Disclaimer: (I forgot to do this last chapter, didn't I) Anyway, I'm still not Stephenie Meyer.

_Chapter V—Lost Love_

**Edward's POV:**

Forks had changed very little in the past six years. It was as though my family and I had never left, or, as I had originally intended it to be, never existed.

I decided I would visit my old house before beginning my mission. It was difficult to find in the lush, overgrown forest. I soon saw it though, and I gasped. It looked nothing it had when we had lived there. The once white walls were now tinted moss green and musky brown. Long vines of ivy completely covered the exterior. The windows were so grimy that I was unable to see past them. Esme would've been heartbroken to see our once beautiful house look so desolate and haunted. I turned to leave, knowing that there was nothing more to see.

Once in town, I began to walk toward Chief Swan's house. I was careful to stay out of sight, for fear of being recognized. I was glad it was a dark, dreary day, making it easier to remain hidden in the shadows.

I wondered what I would find when I got to Chief Swan's house. I was nearly certain that Bella would not be living there anymore. For all I knew, she could be living in Australia. After all, she was now twenty-four years old. I was only going to Chief Swan's house to look for clues as to where to find her.

Many memories flooded me as the house came into view. Unlike my home, Chief Swan's house had not changed very much in past six years. Besides a new paint job and new shutters, the house looked exactly how I remembered it.

I deeply inhaled the air around me, taking all the familiar smells, searching for one in particular. _Ah! There it was! _The faint smell of Bella's irresistible scent filled my nostrils. I smiled like a fool. She was still here! Well, not here at the moment. The scent was not fresh; I could tell it had been from earlier. But she was here! The oldest the scent could've been was from yesterday, so it meant she must've been close. It would not be too difficult to find her now.

My original plan was to sneak into the house and look for some information about the whereabouts of Bella, but the television blared from the direction of the family room, a sure sign that Chief Swan was home. Even I would not risk sneaking in there. If I were caught, I'd have a whole lot of explaining to do.

But I did not want to wait until tomorrow. No, correction: I was incapable of waiting for tomorrow. Smelling her glorious scent had given me more hope than I had ever imagined.

And then I had an idea. I approached Chief Swan's mailbox, praying that he had forgotten to check for mail. It was my only hope. I opened the flap, and sure enough there was a pile of mail. I quickly flipped through the mail, hoping for _something. _And there is it was, a light blue envelope addressed in Bella's curvy scrawl, a birthday card for Charlie. But that was not what I was interested in. My eyes strayed to the corner of the envelope, where the return address was written. Apparently Bella lived close by, but something else caught my eyes. The name on the sticker read Isabella Swan. Not Isabella Newton, not Isabella Yorkie, not Isabella Crowley. Isabella Swan.

I practically skipped down the street to the sight of the address, feeling more alive than I had in over one hundred years.

The house was small, but charming, painted pale yellow with light green shutters. Bella's scent was now overpowering, but there was also a sickening, slightly familiar scent that I could not put my finger. I didn't care. I was only moments before I would see Bella.

A car pulled up to the driveway, so I was careful to hide in the wooded area beside the house. A young man who looked vaguely familiar got out of the car. I took me a moment to realize it was the boy called Jacob Black from the La Push reservation. Then I recognized the smell. Werewolf. I growled formed deep in my chest. What was _he _doing here?

He walked up to the porch and suddenly the door flew open. A beautiful young woman fell into his open arms. It was Bella, _my _Bella.

Jacob Black adorned her face with gentle kisses and smoothed her lovely brown hair. And she kissed him back just as fervently. My dead heart shattered. But that was not the worst of it. When Bella pulled away from his arms, I saw that her stomach had a slight, but definite curve. Bella was pregnant. Bella was carrying a _werewolf's _child!

Being the creature I am, I am not capable of dying, but if I had been, I would've died right then. All hope was drained from me in that one moment. She had moved on, just as I had intended. And it was entirely my fault. I would've done anything to have her back now, even taken away her mortality.

"Jake, darling, I'm going to stay out here for a little while longer. You can go in if you'd like," Bella's voice was sweet and smooth. It was music to my ears.

"I think I'll go in if that's alright, Bella, honey," the werewolf said.

I growled. That _dog_ was calling _my _angel pet names. I had not left just for her to choose another monster.

"Fine by me," Bella said and pecked him affectionately on the cheek.

If possible, my heart broke even more. Jacob Black entered the house and disappeared behind the door. Bella remained on the porch. She leaned over the side, her brown hair billowing in the breeze. It was shorter now, I noted. Her hair now only fell just above her shoulders. It made her look older, but not in a bad way. God, she was beautiful. If possible, she had grown even more gorgeous in the past six years. She was slightly taller and had fully grown into her body. If I had not known her, I might have mistaken her for a vampire, for her skin was still the same translucent white, tribute of the sunless climate of Forks.

The happiness I had seen on her face when Jacob Black had been with her was now vacant. Her pretty lips were turned into a frown. She absentmindedly pealed some paint off the porch railing, as if deeply troubled by something. Oh how I wished I could read her mind! I wanted to run to her and take her in my arms, letting her know that I was there and that everything would be okay. But I could not. She was not mine anymore. She had chosen another man.

Alice and the others had been correct. They had warned me not to return after this long, in fear that I would not like what I found. They had been all too right. I knew I would have to leave soon, without telling Bella how much I loved her. It would hardly be fair to her now. She had moved on and stared another life. She would go on living, never knowing, while I would forever carry the burden of knowing what had become of her, unable to change what had become. _It's your own fault, _my conscience taunted me mercilessly.

But I could not make myself leave yet. I was not yet ready to let her go. I remained in the forest, watching. Beautiful Bella, my lost love.

* * *

A/N: How many of you would be interested in reading a story about the Volturi? I have an idea I would like to try out if anyone would be interested (Don't worry, it wouldn't be at the expense of writing this story. Let me know what you think)


	7. My Life Forever

A/N: I was in such a writing mood this weekend. I seriously spent all of Sunday writing.

Thanks again for the reviews, and remember to continue to give me feedback. I'm not like Edward. I can't read your minds :)

Disclaimer: I am not Stephenie Meyer.

_Chapter VI—My Life Forever_

**Bella's POV:**

I remained on the porch, lost in thought. Often, when I was alone, I gave into my emptiness and sadness. I often wished to speak of it to Jacob, but he would never understand. I wondered if the feeling of loneliness would ever completely go away. When I was with Jacob, it was close. I would feel happy, almost completely whole. Almost.

I sighed, getting ready to go in when something caught my eye. The evening sun had just appeared through a break in the clouds, making the wet leaves shine. But that was not what I had seen. Among the trees by the side of the house, I had seen something glitter as the sun hit it. I was sure it was more than the sunlight on the leaves. It was all too familiar. I knew I should've turned around and ignored it, but I was terribly curious. I stepped off the porch and began to walk toward the glittering light, letting my imagination run wild.

I gasped as I walked through the vegetation, for it _was _himI saw before me. Never had my delusional Edward looked this beautiful. His bronze hair shined in the faint sunlight. His lovely eyes looked as though they were made of pure gold. He stood tall, his white skin sparkling slightly. But something was different. Usually, my delusional Edwards were smiling and full of life. This one was different. He looked at me, his eyes full of despair.

"Bella," he whispered in his velvety voice.

His voice was beautiful, lovelier than I remembered it. Maybe it was like this because it had been so long since I had let go. In fact, I didn't think I had let myself have a hallucination since I had gotten married.

He looked so real, like a Greek god standing before me. I reached out, hesitantly, for I was afraid if I touched him, he would shimmer and disappear. But when my hand touched his perfect arm, he did not vanish. I felt his cold, marble flesh beneath the warmth of my own skin. I pulled away quickly, sure that I had imagined it. But I had not.

"Edward?" I gasped, not believing it was truly him.

He said nothing, just took my hands in cold ones.

I could not believe it. Why had he come back? Why now, just when everything was beginning to work out? Utterly confused, I began to sob.

"Shh, Bella, sweet, don't cry," his voice was soothing.

He wrapped his strong arms around me, and I didn't protest. I leaned into his broad shoulder until my tears had run their course.

"I'm so sorry, Bella," he whispered, his lips against my ear.

I couldn't say anything at first. I didn't know what to do. I felt so lost, so torn.

"You came back," I finally managed to say, at loss for a reason.

He didn't say anything; he just pulled me close to his chest in a bone-crushing hug. I deeply inhaled his familiar scent, causing more tears to spill.

"I saw you with _him_," Edward's voice was full of hatred, but there was also a sense of deep pain there, too.

I didn't know what to say. Why did it suddenly feel so wrong to love Jacob?

"Please, Bella," his voice was heavy, "Tell me what has happened with your life since I have been gone."

I could tell that part of him was eager to hear my story, while another part would never want to know.

"The whole thing?" It was all so painful to remember.

"The whole story. And I shall know if you are lying," he smiled, a sad smile that did not reach his eyes.

I sighed and began. I started my story with right after he had left, but did not emphasize the pain I had felt (the pain I was still feeling) to the full extent. I merely told him that I had been unsure of how to move on in the beginning. I was almost sure he could see through my ruse, but he said nothing, continuing to breathe in every word I said. I proceeded to the part about Jacob, and, unfortunately, had to tell about the motorcycles, for I could not think of a better excuse for why I had been visiting Jacob so suddenly. He seemed angry, but also slightly amused. I did not tell him of the voices. That would've been much too embarrassing. Next, I told him of my hike to our meadow, only to find Laurent awaiting me.

"Laurent? From James's coven?" Edward interrupted furiously.

I nodded, "But Jake and his pack saved me," I said proudly.

I heard him mumble something about adolescent werewolves. I ignored him and continued.

I proceeded to tell him about Victoria, and I found out that Edward had been tracking her himself, but had followed a false lead to South America. I told him how my werewolves had been able to kill her easily, too. The whole time I heard Edward growling and cursing about his stupidity.

The next part was the hardest to tell. Telling his about Jacob would not be easy. He waited expectantly, so I continued, "After Victoria was killed, things slowed down a lot. Jake and I just gradually became closer."

I sighed. I could see the pain in his face as I went on.

"I didn't think you were ever coming back," I admitted, still confused by his sudden return. "And there was something about Jake that held me together. I knew that I needed him if I was going to go on.

"We got married about a year and a half ago, much to Charlie's delight, but much to Renee's horror. She didn't want a young marriage to fail me as it had her. But I ignored her pleas, going on with a small, but wonderful wedding with Jake. Charlie and Billy surprised us by buying us a small house…" I trailed off.

I turned to face Edward to see his reaction. At once, I knew tears would've spilled freely from his eyes if he had been able to cry. I could not bear to see him this way.

"I'm so sorry, Edward," I whispered.

"You have no need to be sorry. It is, I, a vile and deceitful liar, who should be sorry," he took my face in his cold hands, "I have never stopped loving you, Isabella Swan. I never thought you would believe my lies. You are my life, Bella. You always have been and shall remain my life forever."

I was not surprised, for somewhere deep inside of me, I had known all along. But now, with it confirmed, I realized something anew. I loved Edward. My love for him had never ceased. Even though I now had Jacob, my love for Edward still remained faithful. I loved them both, not one over the other.

Tears mingled with sorrow and happiness spilled down my cheeks.

"Oh, Edward!" I cried, throwing my arms around his neck.

I felt him flinch slightly in surprise, but soon he leaned fully into the embrace. And before I knew what was happening, I realised I had pressed my lips to his cold, granite ones. The burden that I had carried for so long fled, and I felt as though I could fly. Unable to restrain my hands, I let my fingers run freely through his bronze hair as I fervently kissed him back.

Reality felt millions of miles away and my mind began to slip to a younger time. I felt seventeen again, free of burdens and gay with love. And at that moment, my spirit flew free, all troubles forgotten, for my Edward still loved me.

Hey, for all of you who expressed interest in a Volturi story, I started to write one this weekend. If your're interested, you can find it in my profile under the name of _Amor Omnia Vincit. _


	8. Betrayed

A/N: Hello everyone! It's been a crazy, crazy week for me. So sorry I haven't updated in a bit.

Sorry, this chapter is pathetically short. I'm working on the next chapter and it should be up sometime this weekend.

And thanks for all the reviews. Your feedback is greatly appreciated.

_Chapter VII—Betrayed_

**Jacob's POV:**

I left my wonderful wife on the porch to go inside to see if I could catch the end of the baseball game. When the game ended, a listless documentary followed, so I turned off the television. I realized that Bella had not yet come inside. I hoped she was feeling all right. Immediately I regretted leaving her alone.

I hurried to the porch a little too quickly in spite of myself. Seeing me worried would just cause Bella more stress than she was already experiencing. I needed to think of something natural and tension-free to say. My stomach rumbled involuntarily, reminding me it was around dinnertime. Yes, that would do. Cooking kept Bella's mind busy and my belly full.

I stepped onto the porch. Bella was not there. My eyes quickly scanned the yard in panic, and there, by the forest, was a sight I could not bear to see. Bella was entwined in a tight embrace, a passionate kiss with _him. _The bloodsucker.

Anger and rage bubbled deep within me. Why was _he _here? And what was he doing to my lovely Bella?

I approached them, snarling. Never had I felt such anger.

"Get your hands off my wife!" I growled.

They broke away from each other in surprise. Bella collapsed to the ground in shock.

"Jake…" she whispered, trembling. I wanted to go to her and gather her in my arms. I could see the pain in her eyes. I had failed to protect her.

The bloodsucker snarled, causing even more anger to fill me. I could feel my body beginning to morph. I had become very good at controlling myself, but this was just too much. I bent my knees slightly, ready to lunge.

"No, Jake!" Bella screamed. "Don't hurt him! It was my fault!"

"What do you mean it was your fault?" I replied angrily. "It was _him _who came back. It was _him _who hurt you," I growled vehemently.

"No, Jake," she sobbed from the ground. "It was me. It was me who saw him in the woods. Me who approached him. And me who kissed him," she choked out the words.

I stared at her in disbelief, pain, and sorrow.

"No," I said weakly, "No…No, it can't be true. No…"

The bloodsucker was still standing there. He had retreated slightly, but still stood in a protective stance. I was surprised that he had not yet said a word.

I was angry with Bella, but not as much as I was sad. And I could see that Bella was distraught too. She sat on the ground, rocking and sobbing.

I bent over to pick her up. The vampire growled, and I glared, and gathered my wife in my arms. She buried her face in my chest. I did not know what I was going to do.

"Leave," I hissed to the bloodsucker. "Leave, and don't come back."

And as I walked back to the house, I felt desolate and betrayed.


	9. Hopelessly Lost

A/N: Wow! 50 reviews! That's more than I ever expected to get. Anyway, I'm sorry that the chapters are so short, but thats about the best I can do right now. I've been so busy lately its a miracle I've even had time to write. I will post the next chapter as soon as I can.

_Chapter VIII—Hopelessly Lost_

**Bella's POV:**

I hurt. The pain that filled my chest was indescribable. Jacob carried me up to our room. He roughly placed me on the bed then left without a word. I didn't know where he went.

I didn't care anymore. I was past caring, past hoping. I sobbed uncontrollably. The hole in my chest was ten times worse than it had ever been. The edges cut deep into my heart, tearing away at everything that had once mattered. Nothing could fix me now. I was completely shattered, hopelessly broken. No one, not Jacob, not Edward, could restore me.

How could I choose now that they were both here? It would not be fair, and even if I were to choose, I would not have been able to. I did not want one over the other. I loved them both equally, although in different ways. I wanted both of them. But that was not possible.

I could not bear the thought of seeing Jacob again. None of this was his fault, and I hated dragging him into my problems. He had been so good to me all these years, and seeing me like that with Edward must have been unbearable. He did not deserve this.

Then there was Edward. Edward who had left me; Edward who had come back. I could not be angry with him, no matter how hard I tried. All the actions that had hurt me so much, he had done out of love, and I could not hate him for that. He had left only out of love, and come back because of love, too. Even though he had come at a bad time and ruined what he had originally left for, I still loved him. He had chosen to leave to protect me. He had given up his own happiness for me. It was not fair that he had to live an eternity like this.

I felt so torn. I could not choose, not after what both of them had done for me. I was lost, with no one to turn to. Hopelessly lost.

* * *

**Jacob's POV:**

I ran. Ran blindly, raging through the forest. I had morphed into my werewolf form, so I was able to run faster than I normally could. I did not know where I was going, nor did I care. I hurt too badly for anything to matter.

Where had I gone wrong? I had done everything in my power to make her happy, to help her forget. I loved her so dearly. Why could she not love me too?

Seeing her with the bloodsucker had been bad enough, but hearing her admit the truth had been tremendously worse. She would choose him over me. I had tried so hard for her, and all he did was hurt her. He had left her when she had needed him most. How could she welcome him back so willingly after what he had done?

I did not understand. I did not know what to do with myself anymore. At that moment, I was hopelessly lost.

* * *

**Edward's POV:**

I had made it worse. Coming back had been a mistake. If I had only left the moment I had seen her, then everything would've been okay. I would've been the only one who was hurt. Now, there were three of us who were hurting, if the werewolf counted.

I knew I needed to leave, but where was I to go? I could not go back to my old so-called life. After knowing, I could not bear to live with myself. I wished to die. I knew my family would never understand. They would never take part in my demise. It would not be easy to end my life. And despite all that had happened, I wanted to stay here. I felt a need to make sure that Bella was safe, a need to protect her. After seeing the way the werewolf morphed as he charged into the forest, I was frightened for her. His thoughts had been bits of angry fragments, and I did not want him to hurt her. But my presence here was dangerous enough. I had already caused enough trouble. But still, I felt obligated to stay.

I sat down heavily in the forest by her house, feeling utterly confused. I was hopelessly lost.


	10. Consequences

A/N: Wow! You guys are reviewing like crazy! I love it!

Anyway, since so many of you seem to be enjoying this, I've been working hard to post as much as possible. I'm terribly sorry for those of you who are disappointed with the short chapters. Its the best I can do.

I've been getting some questions about whether or not Jacob imprinted on Bella. I originally began to write this before I read _Eclipse, _so I did not know about imprinting. So to answer your questions, imprinting does not exist in my story so therefore Jacob did not imprint on Bella.

_Chapter IX—Consequences_

**Bella's POV:**

"He's still here," Jacob said as he entered the room later that night. "I can smell him."

Jacob's clothes were torn and sweaty, and his shoes nowhere to be seen. He smelled of the forest, I noted, as he climbed into bed. There was no doubt that he had morphed in his state of anger. I felt terrible.

"Jacob—" I tried, but he abruptly turned on his side and scooted as far away from me as possible.

I was hurt, even though I knew I deserved it. Silent tears trickled down my cheeks. I could not remember a night when I had not fallen asleep in Jacob's arms.

As the night wore on, I began to feel pains in my stomach. I ignored them though, for the pain in my heart was much worse. Sleep did not claim me until early morning, when the sun was just beginning to peak over the horizon. I slept fitfully and awoke around nine, with the other side of the bed empty. Jacob was gone.

I did not want to get up. I was content to lie on the bed and waste away, if it meant not facing my dilemma. But I knew I at least needed to try.

I got out of bed and scooped up Jacob's torn clothes from the night before. Tears stung my eyes. Why was this happening to me?

I mentally made a list of household chores that needed to be done. That would keep my mind occupied for a time.

I started with the laundry. A huge basket of dirty clothes awaited me by the washer. Jacob was as messy as a child and I hated to think what the laundry would be like after the baby came along. The baby. It seemed to make this situation even worse. I quickly began my next chore, dusting, before I lost control. When I had finished, I tackled the bathrooms next.

As I did each chore, the pain in my stomach grew considerably worse. I didn't mind though, for it was a distraction to the ache in my heart. And being so distraught, it did not occur to me that the pain could mean anything.

It wasn't until I was in the kitchen, deciding what I could make Jacob for dinner, that I realized something was wrong. As I began to rummage around the refrigerator, I felt a liquid suddenly seep between my thighs. I was confused at first, and it took me a moment to realize that my water was breaking. But why now? The baby was not due for a few more weeks. Before I could panic, a sharp pain shot agonizingly through my body and I passed out.

* * *

A/N: A little cliffhanger...I'll try to update ASAP :)


	11. More than Pain

A/N: Sorry to leave you hanging. I've been so busy lately. Plus, i just bought Stephenie Meyer's new book, _The Host, _and have been obsessively reading it. Have any of you read it yet?

Anyway, I've alway been kinda sick lately. (really bad stomach aches) So staring at a computer is kinda nauseating...

Another short chapter. I will update when I can.

_Chapter X—More than Pain _

**Edward's POV:**

I immediately rushed into the house as soon as I heard Bella hit the floor. Unable to think of anything else to do, I had spent the night in the forest by Bella's house. I heard her muffled sobs as she cried herself to sleep, and I had watched her go about her household chores miserably.

I entered the kitchen to find Bella sprawled out across the floor. I bent down beside her and pressed my cold hand to her damp forehead. Her eyelids fluttered open, and she looked around with a dazed expression.

"Edward," she whispered, her voice trembling.

I gathered her gently into my arms. She began to cry.

"Shh, Bella, sweet," I whispered, rocking her in my arms. "Can you tell me what happened?"

Her eyes glanced down toward her legs. I followed her gaze and noticed a patch of liquid seeping through her pants. The baby.

A jolt of pain must have shot through her, for she flinched in pain and let out an agonizing scream.

"Edward, it hurts!" Bella sobbed, burying her face in my shoulder. She curled her legs up to her stomach. "Make it stop!"

More than anything I wanted to make her pain go away, but it was not in my power. Instead, I gained my composure.

"Bella, can you tell me where the keys to your car are?" I asked as calmly as I could.

I could see Bella trying hard to think through her pain. "On the key ring…by the phone," she finally answered. I grabbed the key and was back by her side in a flash.

"And Jacob's phone number?" I knew the responsible thing to do would be to tell Jacob.

"The sticky note by the phone has the shop number," she curled up in a ball on he floor, tears streaming from the corners of her eyes.

I quickly dialed the number. The line was busy. Bella cried out in agony. Time was running out. I quickly pulled a scrap piece of paper and scribbled a quick note.

I scooped Bella up into my arms and placed her into the passenger seat of the car. I drove with one arm, the other arm wrapped securely around Bella. She whimpered throughout the ride, her face distorted in agony. I was sure she was biting back the screams.

I did not think of the consequences if I was recognised in a public place. Bella's health was much more important.

Once in the hospital, Bella was immediately admitted to a room.

"Are you her husband?" one of the nurses asked as I attempted to enter Bella's room.

"No, just a close friend," I confessed.

"Then I'm going to have to ask you to—"

Bella's scream cut her off. I was by her side in flash.

"Edward, don't leave me. Please," she begged me.

I turned to look at the nurse. She sighed. "For right now it will be all right."

I watched as the doctors took her vitals, such a simple action, but I could tell how terrified Bella truly was. Tears threatened to pour from her eyes, and her breath came out in short, rapid gasps.

"Bella, I promise everything will be fine," I tried to reassure her. I pressed her shaking hands to my lips.

She nodded, trying so hard to be brave, but I could tell that the pain she was feeling was indescribable.

"I'm going to have to ask you to leave now," one of the doctors appeared by my side.

I nodded, reluctantly letting go of Bella's hand. She was now in so much pain that I don't think she even noticed that I left.

Before leaving the room, I pulled one of the doctors aside.

"Will she be okay?" I whispered.

He hesitated. "We're not sure. She's gone into labor so early…and we still have to check a few other things…" he trailed off.

I left, heading down the hallway toward the waiting area. I sat down heavily on one of the chairs, doing all that I could for the time being. Wait.


	12. Guilt

A/N: Sorry it's been so long since I've updated. My cousin got married last weekend so my aunt came into town with her family and have been staying with us.

Anyway, I was having tons of trouble with this chapter. My younger sister actually helped me write a lot of it, so thank her that this update didn't take any longer than it already did.

Another cliffie at the end, sorry (though you do seem to review more when I leave a cliff hanger...:))

_Chapter XI—Gulit_

**Jacob's POV:**

I left for the car shop earlier than I usually did. My anger from the night before still pulsed through my veins.

The dull morning sunlight streamed through the window. I saw that Bella had finally fallen asleep. I had heard sniffling most of night, and was relieved to see that sleep had finally claimed her.

I debated whether or not to leave until she awoke. Deep down inside, I wanted nothing more than to wrap her in my arms and give her my forgiveness, but pride kept me from doing so.

She loved that stupid bloodsucker -- I knew she had, and I knew she always would. She loved me too, but there would always be that part of her heart that would never love me; it would always belong to him.

I left the room; I couldn't stand to be in that stuffy enclosed room for much longer. It caused me pain to look at Bella, her belly swollen with our child. That at least was something I could give her that he could not. A baby. I could give her a child.

My feet carried me to the car, away from Bella, our baby, and all the problems that had come up. I hated him for it -- he had stolen my perfect life that Bella and I had worked so hard to create.

As I drove, I debated about going to Sam's. Instanly, I decided against it. I could not face him. I could not admit what had happened. Another option was morphing, again, as I had done is my fury last night. That would be running away from it all. It would be the cowardly thing to do.

I soon arrived at the car shop I owned with Embry. Embry was already at the shop, getting an early start as he always did.

"Hey Jake," he said, looking up from under the hood of an old station wagon.

"Hey Embry," I tried my best to hide the pain in my voice, but Embry saw through it.

"Is everything okay? You don't look so great," he informed me.

I didn't want to tell him. It was too painful. It would be too hard to tell Embry the truth.

"Everything's fine, Embry," I said firmly.

Embry shrugged, and I could tell he was debating whether or not to say more. Fortunately, he dropped the topic. We worked in silence, the only sound the clinking of the tools as we worked on the cars.

As I worked, I recollected the events from the previous night. I remembered the look on Bella's face, a look a pure pain and hopelessness. And then I remembered the way I had treated her, roughly throwing her on the bed, showing no attempt to hide my anger. A feeling of guilt crept into my mind, and I began to wonder if it had been a mistake to leave Bella so abruptly this morning_._

The feeling would not go away. Vivid images began to fill my mind: Bella crying out in agony, withering in intense pain. Bella lifeless body, her flesh pale and cold.

I tried to ignore them; they were irrational thoughts. But as the feeling of guilt began to turn to one of foreboding, I figured it could not hurt to call Bella, see if she as okay, and _maybe _apologize for my selfish actions.

I picked the phone and dialed. It rang four times before Bella's cheery voice came on the machine. I rush of panic shot through me. _Stop it, _I told myself. _You're being paranoid. She's probably just fine._

But I couldn't help but to worry. I called back just five minutes later. No answer. Five more minutes. Still no answer.

"Embry, I told Bella I'd come home for lunch today," I lied lamely.

"All right, Jake," Embry replied, his voice a bit muffled because he was lying under an old van.

I hurried home, suddenly even more panicked than before. I knew something was terribly wrong. The feeling was so intense that I didn't try to talk myself out of it.

When I arrived at the house, I knew at once it was too silent. There was no one here. I could feel it. I entered the kitchen, looking for any sign to where Bella could be. It was then that I saw the note.

_Took Bella to the hospital. The baby is coming. Tried to call you, but no answer. _

_-Edward_

His handwriting was neat, even though it was done in a hurried scrawl. I had to read the note three times before I fully understood its contents.

In a flash, I was back in my car and headed for the hospital. I immediately saw the bloodsucker in the waiting area. He answered before I could ask the string of questions that ran through my mind.

"I don't know how she is. They won't let me in. I just brought her ten minutes ago. She's in room 48."

I left before he was finished. My eyes scanned the room numbers. 42, 44, 46, 48…

I burst into the room. A group of doctors and nurses gaped at me in surprise.

"Excuse me…" tried one of the doctors.

I ignored them and was at Bella's side in a flash.

"Bella, honey, are you okay?" I brushed her hair away from her damp forward.

"Jake…" her breath was shallow and labored. A small smiled formed on her lips. I took her hands in mine. "I'm so sorry it has to be this way, but I want you to know that I will always love you, Jake. Truly, I always will…"

What was she talking about? "Bella, darling, everything is going to be okay. I promise. It will all—"

"I'm going to have to ask you to lea—" the doctor started.

"But I'm her husband," I tried.

"I'm sorry, but we are having some complications. She is not doing very well and the baby is facing the wrong way….the only hope is an emergency c-section."

I couldn't respond. I could only watch as they wheeled my wife down to the operating room.


	13. Darkness

Good news: School ended today.

Bad News (for you guys, at least): I'm going on vacation next week, so I won't be able to update for a bit (unless I can crank out another chapter by tomorrow)

I'm almost done with this story (like maybe two or three more chapters at the most) I don't know if that is good or bad news. You can decide.

And since I am almost done, I'll be thinking about new ideas to write. So what would you be interested in reading? I have a few other Twilight stories stared. I have a story about the Volturi called _Love Conquers All, _I have an AU titled _A Twist of Fate, _and I have a humorous serious called _Life Among the Cullens. _I also have some other ideas (i.e writing Esme's story or just anything about Esme. Maybe some Esme and Carlisle fluff :D)

But I want to know what you guys would be interested in reading. There is no point in writing something that you won't read. What are you in the mood to read right now? Let me know and I will do my best to write it.

Okay, enough about me. I'll let you read now

_Chapter XII—Darkness_

**Edward's POV:**

The werewolf soon joined me in the waiting area. I heard his confused thoughts as he sat down across the room from me.

He was shocked. So many things had been throttled at him at once. My return, the early labor…and the words Bella had spoken to him. _I'm so sorry it has to be this way, but I want you to know that I will always love you, Jake. Truly, I always will…_

They confused me too. Why would she speak that way to Jacob…It was if she was anticipating something to go wrong, like she knew something that Jacob and I did not.

We didn't speak. I soon toned out his thoughts. I closed my eyes.

We waited.

I do not know how much time passed. It must have been only a few hours, but to me it felt like years, centuries, eons.

The young doctor, whom I had seen previously, entered the waiting area. His thoughts immediately infiltrated through my mind. They were wordless thoughts, painful images, worse than what any words could describe.

I saw images of blood. I heard screams of agony. Bella's screams, her face contorted from the pain. But worst of all, I saw the lifeless body covered by a pale white sheet.

I was unable to breathe. It couldn't be true. No…

Jacob was on his feet immediately. Even though he could not read the doctor's mind, he could tell that there was something terribly wrong.

"You have a beautiful baby girl," the doctor said solemnly, the enthusiasm and excitement that should've accompanied those words were absent.

I saw a flicker of hope in Jacob's eyes at the mention of his daughter, but he was not to be distracted. "But what about Bella? Is my wife all right?"

The doctor hung his head. _How can I tell him?_ he thought. There would be no easy way to put what had to be said into words. "The birth was very difficult. She lost a lot of blood," was all he could say.

Jacob knew what these words meant, but he would not accept them. "So? So how is she now? Is she doing better?"

"She didn't make it," the doctor's voice almost cracked. "We thought we were going to lose both her and the baby. It's a miracle that we got the baby out alive."

"But couldn't you do something?" Jacob was infuriated now. "Why couldn't you save her?"

"We tried. We tried everything. It was like…" the doctor chose his words very carefully, "she had no will to live, like she knew she was going to die. She kept screaming two names. Edward. Jacob. She made me promise me I'd tell them how much she loved them."

He knew (I could tell even without reading his mind) that we were those two. "I'm so sorry," he whispered.

Jacob was on the verge of attacking the doctor. His thoughts were murderous, and I could he was doing everything in his power not to lunge at the doctor. I couldn't blame him. He had every right to be furious. His Bella—my Bella—_our _Bella was gone.

"Would you like to see your daughter?" the doctor made his best attempt to lighten to mood.

Jacob nodded, and I could see tears brimming in his eyes. I followed them, even though the invitation had not been extended to me. The doctor led Jacob to the nursery, where a row of tiny babies were sleeping soundly. He picked up a small pink bundle and handed it to Jacob.

Even at a distance, I realised she smelled like a very faint version of her mother. Beneath the blanket and cap, I saw a little pink face peeking out. She was very tiny. Just over five pounds, I heard the doctor say. She was fast asleep, her tiny chest moving up and down with each small breath. I do not know how long Jacob stood there, holding his daughter, completely in awe. The pain he was feeling momentarily faded. With each breath she took, Jacob became more and more hopeful. Even in death, there was the hope of new life.

I left soon after that. It was nearly dark outside. The crown of the deep orange sun rested just above the horizon. Musky purple clouds filled the sky. Twilight.

I didn't know where to go, didn't know what to do. The time I spent apart from Bella after I left had been bad enough. At least she had been alive, still living, still breathing. If only could've saved her…if only I had never left in the first place, if only I had never come back. The 'ifs' tormented me. There was no way to reverse what had already happened. How could I go on now, knowing that her heart was no longer beating, especially when it was my fault? Yes, it was my fault. I admitted the terrible truth to myself.

The pain I was feeling now was nothing compared to what I had felt after I left Bella. I no longer had a will to live. There was nothing left to hope for.

I realised I had wondered somewhere into the forest. I was lost, lost among the endless maze of tree. I sat down heavily on the ground. Involuntarily, I began to think of ways to destroy my life. My options were limited, for only a werewolf or another vampire could end my existence.

But then I thought of Bella, sweet, beautiful Bella who had died in anguish in pain. Not only physical pain, but the pain brought on by choice. She had been torn, and instead of making a decision, she decided not to choose. Bella had died in vain. Her love for both Jacob and me had been so strong that she did not want to hurt either of us, but by making the ultimate decision, she had hurt both of us more than she could ever imagine.

I sobbed tearlessly. Each sob tore through my body, making my pain even worse.

"Why?" I screamed into the darkness. "Why Bella? Why _me_?"

I curled up a pathetic ball, shaking from anger and sorrow, wishing for the darkness to consume me.

* * *

Now you probably all hate me right now, which is understandable. I just killed off the main character of the Twilight Saga. Now you can flame me or tell me how horrible I am, but think about it. Bella would not have been able to choose between Edward and Jacob, and even if she would've been able to, she would've been miserable for the rest of her life. Think of Padme from _Star Wars. _Its a perfect comparison to what Bella was feeling.

I truly am sorry, all my Bella fans. Go read my story _Life Among the Cullens _if you need some happy Edward and Bella fluff now.


	14. Life Goes On

A/N: This chapter is short, but it says a lot. Yes, this _is _the last chapter, but I intend to write an epilogue of some sort.

I just want to say thank you to all of you who reviewed. I appreciated each one of them, and really, it was your eager reviews that kept me writing. I never expected to get this many reviews.

Check out some of the other things I've written. I have a few things I think you might enjoy.

_Chapter XIII—Life Goes On_

**Jacob's POV:**

The funeral was held a few days later. We buried her in the old Forks cemetery, the home of just about everyone who had ever died in Forks. Her bright, unblemished tombstone stood out among the old, withered ones.

It was a small funeral. A few members of the Quileute tribe had come, Quil, Embry, Sam's family. Emily's eyes were wet with tears, and even her three small children were silent, as if they could even sense the solemnity of the occasion. Dad and Charlie had also come. Dad's face was composed, but I could see that Charlie was doing everything in his power not to breakdown. Bella was all that he had had left in this world. Renee and Phil had flown in from Florida two days ago, utterly shocked and devastated by the news. Bella's mother sobbed openly while she clung to her husband's arm. Edward was there, too. He hid amongst the trees in the surrounding forest, for his presence was unexplainable.

And then there was me. I held tiny Alice in my arms, the only thing in life that kept me going. She cooed softy, her soft brown eyes, Bella's eyes, staring up into mine. She had not a care in the world. She did not know that her mother was now buried deep in the ground, beginning to rot away. She would not know how it felt to be held in her mother's arms. She would not grow up knowing the sound of her mother's voice or her mother's goodnight kiss before she fell asleep at night. And lastly, she would not know of her mother's love.

A tear rolled down my cheek as I thought of all the things I had taken for granted while Bella had been alive. Only about a week ago, our lives had been carefree, our futures so definite. But everything had changed in the blink of an eye. Everything that mattered seemed to be so insignificant now. I would now raise my daughter. Alone.

The small congregation slowly left the cemetery, leaving to go on with their normal lives. But I stayed. I had no life to go back to. I clutched my baby as I stood in front of my wife's grave. It was then the tears came, and once they started, they were unstoppable. As my tears fell, so did my anger, my despair, and my anguish.

I do not know how much time passed, but after a while, the clouds parted, allowing the bleak sun to shine through. A gentle breeze blew by, drying my tears. And as it passed, I heard, although I cannot be sure it was not just my imagination, a soft voice.

_I love you, and I will be with you always, _it whispered to my heart.

I stood there for a moment, absorbing every word. It gave me a sense of peace I had never felt before. I took a deep breath, knowing what needed to be done.

I left the cemetery, leaving behind a piece of my life. It was the first step to starting over, the first step to coming back into life. Every part of life has a meaning; we just don't know it when each event occurs. I didn't know the reason for the things that had happened in my life up to now, but I did know there was still much more awaiting me on the path ahead. And as we walked back to the house, little Alice smiled, reminding me that life will always go on.


	15. A Piece of You

A/N: Hey everyone! I just got back from vacation, if it could really be considered a vacation. I went on a mission trip down to New Orleans. You'd be surprised how much work still has to be done, even three years after Katrina. We gutted houses, put up dry wall, painted…and tons more. Let me tell you, it was hard work. And it was hot. I don't think it was ever under 90 degrees during the day.

A lot of you have been asking about a sequel for this story. I think the epilogue sums it up pretty nicely, but that's just my opinion. I am in no way opposed to writing a sequel, but you'll need to give me some inspiring ideas. I need ideas from you to get my creative juices flowing.

Again, I want to thank everyone of you who took the time to review. I truly appreciate it. I've really enjoyed seeing your opinions and getting to know a few of you.

_Epilogue—A Piece of You_

**Edward's POV:**

Time is a curious thing. How is it, that sometimes years fly by, as if no more than a few days have passed by, while sometimes the years drag on, so that only one can compare to a century? Is there truly such a thing as time, measuring all of the events in our lives? Or is time merely something invented by mankind in attempts to explain the cycles of life, or the universe around them? Is time something we have made? Something made to explain what we do not know? In all my years, I have found no answer.

The year of my life that I spent with Bella often felt as though it went faster than an hour did now. After her death, I spent my time in the deepest, darkest places I could find. I would lay there, wallowing in my pity for what seemed like an eternity. But when I left, I would be surprised to find that only a few hours had passed. Time did not have the same meaning for me as it once had. Forever was too long to spend this way.

But as far as I was concerned, I was incapable of doing anything else. So I continued that way, sulking, brooding, dwelling in the haunting memories of the past, and grieving for what my life had become. So time passed, in a pathetic and pitiful sort of way. The hours turned into days, the days to weeks, weeks to months, and finally the months to years. And then one day, I decided that I needed to go back.

It had been many years since I had last been Forks, but still, I was surprised to see how much it had changed, although I should not have been. Time may be eventless for one of the undead such as myself, but humans never ceased to stop propelling forward.

Forks was now quite a bit larger, but still small enough to be considered a small town. Shabby old buildings had been torn down and flashy new ones had been built to replace them. I went to see what my old house now looked like. I swallowed the lump in my throat when I saw that it was no longer there. The whole forest area that had once surrounded our house was now cleared away, and a shopping centre was built in its place. I turned to leave before I was overtaken by emotion.

Next, I went to Chief Swan's house. Alice had informed me that he had died a couple of years after Bella, but seeing his once familiar house was still a shock to me. A wing had been added to the house, giving it a larger appearance, and it had been painted, so it was barely recognizable. Two small children played in the yard while a middle-aged woman worked in a quaint garden.

Lastly, I went to the cemetery where Bella was buried. The grave looked just how I remembered it, just slightly more withered. The grass was cut back from it, and a bouquet of fairly new roses had been placed by its side. Jacob had done well.

I stood there in silence, wondering what I had expected to find. I inhaled the air around, and the faint smell of Bella's scent filled my lungs, as if to torture me. Memories came back faster than I could control.

"Whatcha doin' mister?" a small voice broke through the silence.

Surprised, I turned suddenly to see who had spoken. It was a young girl of about ten or eleven years. She was a grubby child; streaks of dirt covered almost every visible part of her skin. Her clothes, too, were quite dirty, and about two sizes too large. Her faded t-shirt fell to about her lower thighs and her baggy jeans were cut off at the knee. She had a huge bruise that covered her right shin and her fingers nails were cut short and caked with mud. Her dark, wild hair was tangled and flew about freely in every direction, and beneath the dirt, her skin was a lovely tan, a rare case for anyone in cloudy Forks. But despite her ragged appearance, the girl had a strikingly beautiful look about her.

"I'm visiting an old friend," I finally replied, answering her question.

"Oh," she said, looking thoughtful, "You're not from around here, are you?"

That was one of the things that had not changed about Forks in the years I had left. The town was still small enough that everyone knew everyone.

"No, but I used to live here very long ago," I answered.

"You don't look very old," she observed, giving me a quizzical look.

_A perceptive child_, I noted as I responded, "You'd be surprised. I'm a lot older than I look."

She smiled slightly, looking up at me with sparkling brown eyes that looked somewhat familiar. And there was something different about her that I could not put my finger on.

"What are you doing here?" I found myself suddenly asking.

The child was now on her knees, picking grass and rubbing it between her small fingers, causing them to turn a bright shade of green.

"Playing," she said. "Our house isn't too far from here. The cemetery is closer than the park, so Daddy says I can play here if I want to go out on my own. Some of the trees over there are really good for climbing." She pointed a green finger over toward the forest. "Daddy says I can't go too far in, though.

"Daddy comes here sometimes, too," she continued. "Mama's grave is here. I come to visit, too, even though I didn't know her. She died when I was just a baby."

She had now gotten up and wiped her grimy hands on her already dirty t-shirt. Her eyes met mine again, and suddenly sense of recognition came over me. This was Bella's daughter. _So that explains the scent, _I thought. She smelled like a very faint version of Bella. I stared at her for a moment, and then I was able to pinpoint what was different about her. Like her mother, I was unable to read her mind.

"What is your name?" I asked. I recalled that Jacob had named his daughter Alice, the name Bella had had her heart set on. It was an act of true love, naming his daughter after one of his enemies, even after Bella's death.

"Alice," she replied from the ground again, this time near a patch of daises. "Here's a flower for you. Why?"

I took the flower from her outstretched hand. "Why what?"

"Why did you ask me my name? Daddy says I shouldn't tell my name to strangers, but you don't seem like a stranger to me."

I was taken back, but replied, "I was just wondering. You look like someone I was knew. Someone I knew when I lived here."

"Maybe it was Mama!" Her brown eyes lit up.

_Perhaps, _I thought. "But then again, maybe not. There are many people in the world…"

Yes, there were many, many people, but it seems that some people have invisible ties connecting them, always bringing them back together.

"Are you alright, mister?" Alice asked, and before I could reply, she reached out a grabbed my hand. "You're so cold!" she exclaimed. "You can come to my house and warm up if you'd like."

_And see your father_, I added. I was not sure of the terms Jacob Black and I were on these days.

"I would really love to," I said. "But I really must be going. You see, I didn't mean to stay here very long."

I regretted that fact that I could not read her mind. I was wondering if she would tell her father about the pale, cold stranger she had seen in the cemetery. I did not want to stay around long enough to find out.

"Oh." She looked slightly disappointed. "Well I have to go home. It's almost time for lunch."

"Farewell then, Alice," I said, already feeling attached to the small girl.

"Goodbye, uh mister—you never told me your name," she realized.

"It doesn't really matter," I said, sighing. "I am not the person I once was. Sometimes I do not even know who I am."

She gave me a curious look then said, "Well then, goodbye, mister."

And then Alice left, running on her skinny legs through the open gate of the cemetery. And suddenly I did not want to lose her like I had her mother.

"Edward!" I called after her. "My name is Edward."

She stopped then, and turned to face me, smiling broadly. And suddenly it wasn't the grubby little child I was looking at. The figure before me had transformed into a gorgeous young woman. Her chocolate colored hair fell gently around her shoulders, her soft, brown eyes sparkled, and her beautiful lips were curved into a smile.

And as fast as it had happened, the woman disappeared and the child was standing in her place once more. She waved once before turning to leave. I watched the small child run until I could see her no longer.

"I will always remember you," I whispered to the wind, not sure if I was speaking to Bella or her child.

And I turned leave, still holding the flower that Alice had given me, at last ready to move on.


End file.
